Raising An “Only Child” Who Isn’t…

"Is he your only child?" Of all of the questions I am asked about my rainbow, Noah, this is one of the most difficult for me to answer. From the standpoint of having a sibling, he is not an only child. He has an older brother, William, who died at birth just over 15 months before [...]

By |2018-08-16T21:08:05+00:00August 16th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Pregnancy After Loss, a Chapter of My Life

I have read about people looking back on their lives, noticing in the bigger scheme that their life is composed of many chapters. Some chapters are clearly defined, some overlap, some are longer, some are shorter. In looking back or even focusing on the present, you can see the effect they had or are having [...]

By |2018-08-15T21:38:59+00:00August 15th, 2018|Emotional Health, Pregnancy|0 Comments

Sunshine & Rainbow–Equally Loved

As my two girls grow older, and I am forced to tuck away their clothes that they have grown out of, I’m left with 2 huge, clear plastic tubs of clothes I’ll probably just store for a few years and then get rid of. Instead of this wasted space, as I’m trying to simplify our [...]

By |2018-08-14T08:41:06+00:00August 14th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Death by Delivery: Know the Risks

You probably saw the headlines, and if you’re a mom pregnant after loss in the US, (or any pregnant mom really!) they probably frightened you. USA Today did an investigative reporting piece on why the maternal mortality rate in the US is so high. The disturbing news is that approximately 700 women in the United [...]

Parenting After Loss: Is Getting By Good Enough?

For a long time after Oberon died, we didn't make any huge decisions. We still wanted a family with living children, so we focused on that. We've been so focused on having a living baby and caring for a living baby...that we haven't thought about much else. I feel so unprepared for what's to come. [...]

By |2018-08-09T19:47:58+00:00August 9th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

The Moment You Find Out There’s Going to Be Another Baby…

You stare down at the pregnancy test. It confirms - as the others you took before it- that you’re pregnant again. All sorts of emotions bubble to the surface. Joy, excitement, overwhelming love – there’s going to be a another baby! There’s relief. You did it. You conceived! But that’s also accompanied by panic, trepidation, and overwhelming fear. Nothing’s [...]

By |2018-08-08T21:03:56+00:00August 8th, 2018|1st Trimester, Pregnancy|1 Comment

What We’re Really Saying about Pregnancy after Loss

Congratulations. Your co-worker, friend, or loved one are pregnant after their loss. You were (hopefully) there to support them when they experienced the heartbreak of their loss and now you're thrilled to be there for them in this subsequent pregnancy. There are a million questions that you want to ask them. You want to talk [...]

By |2018-07-26T19:52:23+00:00July 26th, 2018|For Friends & Family, Pregnancy|0 Comments

The Grieving Body: A Body Without a Baby

Photo by Danielle MacInnes on Unsplash After a miscarriage or stillbirth the body grieves. There is the emotional and spiritual pain of loss as well as living in a no-longer pregnant body. Depending on the length of the pregnancy the reflection in the mirror may appear suspended between being pregnant and not being pregnant. Caring for [...]

5 Reasons to Take a Million Pictures of your Rainbow Baby

At the Make Way for Ducklings statues in Boston. The ducklings were wearing their rainbow scarves. A few weeks ago my daughter and I went on an outing with a few friends. As we toured some of the favorite spots in Boston, I snapped many--probably hundreds, if I'm honest-- pictures of my daughter. [...]

By |2018-07-23T15:31:57+00:00July 23rd, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Postpartum Nesting

Photo by Echo Grid on Unsplash When people hear that newborns sleep between 16-18 hours a day, there is a common misconception that this occurs all at once, or in longer chunks than the realistic 2-3 hours (maybe once a day a stretch of 4 hours, if you’re lucky!). There is the idea that postpartum is [...]