Let’s Talk About Miscarriage

I never thought it would be me. Maybe it was sweet naivety because this was my first pregnancy. Maybe it was ignorance because I never saw it happen to anyone I knew well. Or maybe it was just misinformation that silence can perpetuate. Whatever the reason, I was far removed from the reality of baby [...]

Faith in December

Faith in December What is faith? What does it mean to believe in something? Faith is not limited to religion or spirituality. Faith is a complete trust in something or someone. It’s a strong belief or a loyalty to a person, thing, science, your children, or even birth. December is a challenging month for many [...]

By | 2016-12-16T11:57:29+00:00 December 16th, 2016|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Normal-Mama Fear, or Loss-Mama Fear?

A little over a week ago, someone in my MOMS Club posted something about a Mom's Day Out program at a local church.  For a moment, I got really excited about it: Once a week, for either a half or a full day, I could take Noah to the church and he would do crafts, [...]

By | 2016-12-15T22:17:33+00:00 December 16th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, Uncategorized|0 Comments

Parenting After Loss: Why We Chose a Sleep Monitor Device

Five years ago this winter, I began working in a children’s hospital. Six weeks into my position there, I held a 6 day old little boy as he started to turn blue. I can still see the desperation in his eyes as he gasped to get air but all that came out was a hoarse [...]

By | 2016-10-28T11:23:00+00:00 October 28th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, Uncategorized|0 Comments

Revisiting My Loss with my Rainbow

Much of what I write about has to do with getting through a pregnancy after a loss. Whenever any member of our community brings a healthy baby home we celebrate. But the PAL journey doesn’t end there.   Pregnancy after loss then becomes parenting after loss. I have heard from many of my clients that the [...]

The subtle

When you met your partner, and the two of you committed to one another (whether this occurred privately between the two of you or publicly with a ceremony), you envisioned happiness in your future. Sure, there would be bumps, but at that time, it was hard to imagine anything that could shake the solid foundation [...]

Branded, Marked & Tattooed

Almost immediately after I lost my first baby at 13 weeks, I wanted a tattoo as a physical reminder of my baby. After the marks of trauma had disappeared and the pain had subsided, the emotional wound remained. I felt marked forever—my heart was broken, never to return to its former shape. But on the [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:07:51+00:00 August 18th, 2016|Pregnancy, Rainbow Birth Stories, Uncategorized|4 Comments

We Are Talking About It

It’s one of the secondary losses we experience around pregnancy loss—we lose our baby and then we realize that talking about is taboo. Those closest to us may prove awkward in our company. We don’t know where to find other parents like us. All at once, this silencing shutters our stories, asks us to shoulder [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:07:52+00:00 August 16th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, TFMR, Uncategorized|0 Comments

An Unexpected Piece of Advice During Pregnancy After Loss

During my PAL I attempted countless times to explain to friends and family how challenging it was to trust that this pregnancy would go well. When people asked if I was excited, I often used terms like "hopefully", "we'll see what happens" and "if we get to bring this baby home."  It felt so lonely that [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:07:52+00:00 August 10th, 2016|Uncategorized|0 Comments

To the Loss Dad on Father’s Day

Another Mother's Day is behind us, but Father's Day is right around the corner. Loss dads deserve our acknowledgement, empathy, and understanding.  They are our co-parents, our partners, and often our supporters.  While every family is different and every partnership is different, we have all experienced a horrible loss.  So, loss dads, I'm talking to [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:08:29+00:00 June 10th, 2016|Emotional Health, For Dads, Uncategorized|1 Comment