Life With Noah: Through the “Last Time” Lens

The word last has been bouncing around in my head a lot lately.  I'm not sure if it's because the topic of "the last child" has come up quite a few times recently in conversations with my friends (who are wrapping their heads around the idea that they are done having children) or because there's [...]

By | 2017-07-21T11:38:05+00:00 July 21st, 2017|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Forgetting Details about the Baby I Lost

Sometimes the death that took them, since it's often the final tangible moment on earth we have of them, shadows the memories of the babies we hoped for and dreamed of. Sadly, sometimes in our minds that individual becomes what happened to them, and memories of the unique baby we were growing begin to slip [...]

Parenting after Loss: When should I worry?

The evening before my daughter’s 15-month well baby visit, I sat down at the computer to fill out an online questionnaire that her pediatrician’s office requested. As I worked through the form evaluating her developmental milestones, I started to worry. I hadn’t been worried. In fact, I was excited for this appointment. I felt she [...]

By | 2017-06-28T08:03:21+00:00 June 28th, 2017|Emotional Health, Parenting After Loss|2 Comments

The Healthy Grief Movement

I didn’t give much thought to grief before losing my son, Zachary, to a heart tumor in 2010. My few experiences with funerals were few and far between. There I observed the bereaved as sullen but composed. They were not weeping, though did shed a few tears. They were not outwardly angry and thanked people [...]

Dear Single Dad Parenting After Loss…I See You, I Appreciate You

Dear Single Dad Parenting after Loss, I know this wasn't what you planned. Parenting after loss is hard enough without learning how to do it on your own...without your partner, the one you went through so much with. You both thought you could withstand everything together until you couldn't. You're in unfamiliar waters now, treading [...]

By | 2017-06-16T13:01:07+00:00 June 16th, 2017|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

She Said Their Names

  “Lavender and Pine,” I said in a sort of disbelief that the moment was happening. For so long I had anticipated the moment I would tell our oldest daughter about her heaven-siblings. I looked forward to the day I would share their names with her and talk about their lives. It was impossible to [...]

Rainbow Babies aren’t Replacements

Rainbow babies aren't replacements, and the first person we have to convince this of is ourself. Many of us wanted to be pregnant immediately after we found out our baby wasn't for earth. Many of us wanted to be pregnant again with the same gender we got attached to but never got to experience in [...]

Life With Noah: Because We Do

Those who regularly read my monthly Parenting After Loss blogs know that Darrell and I have spent the last 12 weeks undergoing fertility treatment to try to grow our family; we transferred our second frozen embryo just two days before last month's post went live.  We hoped that this month would find us sharing the [...]

By | 2017-06-02T15:27:53+00:00 June 2nd, 2017|Loss After Loss, Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Book Review: Expecting Sunshine by Alexis Marie Chute

When Lindsey Henke founded Pregnancy After Loss Support (PALS) almost three years ago, there were few resources for women who were pregnant after a pregnancy, infant, or child loss (PAL). In those three years, PALS has contributed to newfound awareness of the unique nature of the PAL experience and more resources are available. Just last [...]