Pregnancy After Loss (PAL) Awareness Photo Challenge 2018

Welcome to Pregnancy After Loss (PAL) Awareness Month Photo Challenge, March 2018. What is Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month? In the world of pregnancy after loss there is a story of hope about a precious new life, and it’s the story of the rainbow baby. It is based on the understanding that the beauty of the [...]

Dear Mama Facing Another Loss

Dear Mama Facing Another Loss, You are strong. You are brave. You are resilient. You have faced the worst that life can throw at you, conquered it, and now you are facing the unimaginable yet again. Even though at time it may feel like it, you are not alone though. I have had three losses, [...]

By | 2018-02-09T18:05:15+00:00 February 9th, 2018|Loss After Loss, Love Letters, PAL Fifth Annual Love Letters|0 Comments

Leaving her behind

I remember how I felt January 1st of 2010. The previous year, 2009, ranked right up there with "worst year ever." Long story short, in the space of twelve months, I had three cancer scares, three major surgeries, three minor surgeries, and lost two babies during pregnancy - Naomi at nearly 19 weeks and Kyria [...]

By | 2018-01-04T21:26:31+00:00 January 4th, 2018|Loss After Loss, Pregnancy|0 Comments

Knowing When It’s Time

When I wrote my October PALS post, we were in the thick of a fresh IVF cycle – I’d just undergone an egg retrieval procedure and we had four perfect embryos. We were looking forward to transferring one of them a few days later, and hopeful that my next PALS post would be a pregnancy [...]

By | 2017-12-14T21:25:24+00:00 December 14th, 2017|Loss After Loss, Parenting After Loss|1 Comment

5 Important Things to Know About Recurrent Miscarriage

1. First and most important, miscarriage is never your fault. Never ever. There is a reason. We just may not ever figure out what it is. One miscarriage is difficult and heartbreaking. Recurrent miscarriages are confusing and devastating. The timing of a miscarriage may suggest different causes. Kristi Bothur at the blog This Side of Heaven, [...]

Not that Different

After I became pregnant with my rainbow baby, it seemed as if I was expected to brush the heartache of past pregnancies aside and assume that nothing would go wrong this time. People often remarked that this was a different pregnancy, implying that certainly there would be a different outcome. But was it really that [...]

By | 2017-10-03T08:06:13+00:00 October 3rd, 2017|Loss After Loss, Pregnancy|0 Comments

A Rainbow in the Darkness

My rainbow baby recently turned one and I find myself reflecting on those dark days of pregnancy. Referring to pregnancy as “dark” probably isn’t socially acceptable. After all, shouldn’t I have been grateful just to be pregnant? Especially after burying a baby less than a year earlier? I was given another chance! Society reminded me [...]

We don’t deserve it

I'm sure you've seen the pictures from Houston and other communities who have been impacted by Hurricane Harvey. In some cases, whole towns have been under water. In others, some neighborhoods on higher ground came through the storm relatively unscathed, while those in low-lying areas were submerged. Lives have been lost, sometimes for no reason [...]

By | 2017-09-01T08:25:59+00:00 September 1st, 2017|Loss After Loss, Parenting After Loss, Pregnancy|0 Comments

When It Happens Again

It was during an early morning visit to the bathroom that I realized I had lost my first baby. I was bleeding and it was red—the 2 things that bring terror to a pregnant woman’s heart. That moment became a snapshot that was burned into my memory—holding the blood-soaked toilet paper. When I became pregnant [...]

By | 2017-08-17T07:18:31+00:00 August 17th, 2017|1st Trimester, Loss After Loss, Pregnancy|2 Comments

Choose What Defines You

In the six-and-a-half years since Zachary’s birth and death, I have grown a lot in how I respond to people. At first, the ignorant comments of others really bothered me and I stewed over them. There are so many things I remember from those early days and months: I remember when my grief for my [...]