I’m a librarian, so maybe it’s natural that when I became pregnant again after a loss, the first thing I did was look for a book. I had my copy of What to Expect When You’re Expecting that my husband had given me when I was first pregnant. But as I looked through it for [...]
Too often we forget that our partners suffer too. Maybe their suffering is more so as they don’t get the same opportunities to grieve in our current culture. Instead, they have to hide their grief. Or, when they take a chance and show their sadness or grief, it is often dismissed by others, as culturally [...]
When a fetal demise happens, it is a heartbreaking situation. For the mother and father. The family. Friends. Believe it or not, it is hard on the nurses as well. We truly care for our patients. We know how hard it is, we cry too. We want to do everything we can to make your [...]
A professional doula's one-on-one care, is critical to the mother's well-being as her providers probably work an on-call schedule. It is not uncommon with a longer labor, to have three different providers and even more nurses taking care of you while at a birth. Often times the doula is the only constant professional throughout a [...]
Women who are pregnant with or without a history of loss face many challenges at work. They wonder who to tell, when to tell, and worry about issues like maternity leave, health benefits, job security and of course, what to do if their water breaks at the office. Women who are pregnant again after a [...]
At a recent conference, I had the good fortune to run into my friend and colleague (as well as fellow PALS Contributor), Dr. Deborah Simmons. We started a conversation about expectations after loss, and were very interested in some of the perceived rules that seem to follow. From this, we came upon the idea of [...]
“A good name is more desirable than great riches and loving favor is better than silver and gold." World English Bible Proverbs 22:1 I once met a woman named Glorious. Her name was absolutely perfect for her—open, joyful, warm and, frankly, glorious is every way. She told me that her name had led her [...]
In working with women who are pregnant again after loss (and their partners), I have realized my task is both simple and complex. While I seek to help clients by normalizing their experience of loss, I also must attend to individual experiences of grief, anger, and fear, as well as moments of joy, relief, and [...]
A guest post by Tara Shafer After my son was stillborn, I remember a sea of flowers. I remember my mailbox full of cards. This support meant such a great deal to me. But I, like others, felt alone. Looking back, the isolation I felt was something similar to the [...]
I am going through photographs of life that I have taken over the last few years. I have certain ways that I like to shoot photos: The rule of thirds. Shooting into the sun. Shooting close-up. A consistent theme is the way that I look for the sun. Maybe the sun is my reminder that [...]
