Dear Healthcare Professionals: Lessons from a Loss Mama

My friend, a fellow loss mama, whose daughter had a fatal diagnosis in the womb was told by the doctor that she wouldn’t want to see her daughter and certainly shouldn’t let her other children meet their sister because “she will look like a monster.” Today, I had a doctors appointment for a sleep study. [...]

How long will this feeling of anxiety last?

It should probably come as no surprise that women in pregnancy after loss (PAL) have higher rates of anxiety and depression during their pregnancy than women who’ve never been pregnant before or women who have never had pregnancy loss. There’s been plenty of research that about 20-25% of women in PAL have anxiety, and another [...]

Communication & Empathy

As a mother who has experienced miscarriage, my empathy towards new mothers is different than that of someone without children of their own, or who has never had a loss. My nursing practice isn't necessarily better, but I tend to notice different elements of my postpartum patient than other nurses. I sometimes understand why the [...]

By |2018-03-05T08:57:02+00:00March 5th, 2018|Birth, For Professionals, From Professionals|0 Comments

The Body in Pregnancy After Loss: The Additional Weight of Grief

When my clients become pregnant again after a pregnancy loss, they often express some degree of dissatisfaction with their weight. They tell me that they never got back to their “starting weight,” the number on the scale at the beginning of the first pregnancy. They express disappointment about this and fear about the weight they [...]

When Breastfeeding Sucks: D-MER After Loss

The breastfeeding relationship can be one of great significance to the mother. When there has been a pregnancy or neonatal loss, breastfeeding one’s subsequent child can take on even more meaning. But when the mother encounters difficulties, expected or unexpected, there is a potential for psychological consequences, including depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and a subjective [...]

5 Important Things to Know About Recurrent Miscarriage

1. First and most important, miscarriage is never your fault. Never ever. There is a reason. We just may not ever figure out what it is. One miscarriage is difficult and heartbreaking. Recurrent miscarriages are confusing and devastating. The timing of a miscarriage may suggest different causes. Kristi Bothur at the blog This Side of Heaven, [...]

Rainbow Clinics are a Thing and They’re Going to Change your Pregnancy After Loss Care

When I was pregnant again after loss, I wanted everyone at my OB’s office to know that I had lost a baby.  I wanted the receptionist to know, the lab technician, the sonographer, the nurses, doctors – anyone with whom I would interact needed to know that I was anxious and scared because of my [...]

By |2017-10-12T14:01:41+00:00October 11th, 2017|For Professionals, From Professionals, Pregnancy, TFMR|1 Comment

Don’t Sleep on your Back: a report from ISA Cork

Amulets for Nate and Sam The International Stillbirth Alliance (ISA) Conference was going to be on September 23-24th. I saw that as a sign. This was going to fall on Nate and Sam’s 10th birthday. I had been to the previous ISA conference, in Vancouver in 2015. It was so well organized and [...]

Pregnancy After Loss–The Dread of The Occasional Encounter

There are people in our lives we only see intermittently. We see the dentist once or twice per year. We see our hairstylist every two to three months (or longer if you are growing it out.) We see certain out of town colleagues only at the big meeting in April. And we see our third [...]

My book is here! Joy at the End of the Rainbow

I’m a librarian, so maybe it’s natural that when I became pregnant again after a loss, the first thing I did was look for a book. I had my copy of What to Expect When You’re Expecting that my husband had given me when I was first pregnant. But as I looked through it for [...]

By |2017-07-10T11:59:39+00:00July 10th, 2017|For Professionals, From Professionals|0 Comments