The Post-Mother’s Day Exhalation

For a loss mom, there is no day that is so communally terrifying as Mother’s Day. It is the day where you feel like you were almost invited to the party that all of the “cool kids” get to go to. It’s the day that can feel like an obligation—to celebrate your own mother (if [...]

A Trigger Question: “Are You Going to Have More Kids?”

  Before losing Zachary, there was no question in my mind about how many kids I wanted. The answer was “lots and close together.” I learned from my loss, however, that I am not in control of every facet of my life. That reality took some getting used to. I was a mess of emotions [...]

Our Heath and Pregnancy after Loss

This topic isn't a fun one, because to some degree many of us have faced a level of unhealthiness. Raise your hand if any of these are you: The temporary comfort of sweets and carbs makes you feel happy if even for just a second--and so you turn to them, frequently. And you don't always know [...]

Five Questions about Pregnancy after Loss in the Workplace

Women who are pregnant with or without a history of loss face many challenges at work. They wonder who to tell, when to tell, and worry about issues like maternity leave, health benefits, job security and of course, what to do if their water breaks at the office. Women who are pregnant again after a [...]

What’s in A Name? A Different View to Naming

At a recent conference, I had the good fortune to run into my friend and colleague (as well as fellow PALS Contributor), Dr. Deborah Simmons. We started a conversation about expectations after loss, and were very interested in some of the perceived rules that seem to follow. From this, we came upon the idea of [...]

Why We Name Our Babies with Tender Care

“A good name is more desirable than great riches and loving favor is better than silver and gold."   World English Bible Proverbs 22:1 I once met a woman named Glorious.  Her name was absolutely perfect for her—open, joyful, warm and, frankly, glorious is every way.  She told me that her name had led her [...]

Expecting Sunshine: Writing as a Tool to “Get Free”

When I was pregnant with my rainbow baby after losing my son, Zachary, I felt like it was nearly impossible to expect sunshine. I was living under a cloud of anxiety. The first few weeks in the pregnancy were a brief calm before the storm. It wasn’t until that initial excitement had passed that I [...]

By | 2017-04-19T11:14:41+00:00 April 19th, 2017|Birth, Emotional Health, Pregnancy|0 Comments

Mikey’s Bump Day Blog, Week 17: Four Months Down, Five More to Go!

At my OB appointment two weeks ago, my doctor provided me with some options to help with my anxiety and depression that’s been getting worse since the beginning of my pregnancy. Since then, I made the decision to start Zoloft. Normally I am against antidepressants, but it's not good for our rainbow baby with how [...]

8 Coping Strategies I Wish I’d Focused on during my Pregnancy After Loss

Although Naval sea combat is not as dangerous as some of the other branches of the military that are located on the ground in a war zone, it is still an exponentially more anxiety-ridden journey than most civilian jobs face. Many women have experienced some degree of sexual harassment, and unfortunately some of us have [...]

By | 2017-04-05T13:45:24+00:00 April 5th, 2017|Emotional Health, Pregnancy|0 Comments

Managing Classes during Pregnancy After Loss

For many women, becoming pregnant means being included in this special “club”—the “mom club” full of insiders that share their wisdom and tips for motherhood. Part of joining this club means partaking in initiation kinds of activities like pre-natal yoga or birthing class. Once your child is born, you are “allowed” into the full versions [...]