Tracy McLaughlin Jaskot

About Tracy McLaughlin Jaskot

Tracy McLaughlin Jaskot is an elementary educator in Massachusetts and mom to three children - her angel son Brayden, her rainbow daughter Ainsley Hope, and her second rainbow due in April 2018. She and her husband, Matt, lost their first son Brayden at 24 weeks gestation in May 2014 due to undiagnosed severe pre-eclampsia which led to a complete concealed placental abruption. Tracy has learned and grown from his stillbirth in more ways than she could have ever imagined. The PALS community has been vital in her subsequent pregnancies, shifting her experience from understandable anxiety to embracing pregnancy with hope.

Fighting the Urge to Overprotect My Rainbow

My friend recently shared a photo of six girls with their arms around each other’s shoulders. Third from the right: me. We went to Kindergarten together, some of us pre-school as well, and we were six years old. We looked so happy in this picture. Photo: Sublime Photo Art Fast forward to now: [...]

By |2019-01-16T21:34:34+00:00January 16th, 2019|Parenting After Loss|1 Comment

My Fourth Christmas Without You

Dear little one, There is something I see in myself ever since you died. In pictures, in the mirror, in my eyes. It’s a tiredness that hasn’t gone away. It could be due to age or brought on by the pregnancies, births and parenting of your younger sister and brother, now three and a half [...]

By |2018-12-19T20:57:21+00:00December 19th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Why I Love to Babywear My Rainbow

Photo: Sublime Photo Art Some parents and caregivers love babywearing. Some do not. Some babies love to be worn in a wrap or a baby carrier, some strongly dislike it. But for me with my rainbows, babywearing has been incredibly meaningful and in some ways even healing. Four years ago, my mom and [...]

“You Got Your Boy!” Gender and Spirit in Pregnancy After Loss

Tracy with her second rainbow, Holden Matthew My firstborn was stillborn and his name was Brayden. When the doctor had told us his gender at an ultrasound appointment just weeks earlier, my husband Matt and I looked at each other and smiled. So many hopes and dreams had filled that moment. I spoke [...]

Pregnancy After Loss, a Chapter of My Life

I have read about people looking back on their lives, noticing in the bigger scheme that their life is composed of many chapters. Some chapters are clearly defined, some overlap, some are longer, some are shorter. In looking back or even focusing on the present, you can see the effect they had or are having [...]

By |2018-08-15T21:38:59+00:00August 15th, 2018|Emotional Health, Pregnancy|0 Comments

A Leap of Faith After Pregnancy Loss: When Your Health Was in Danger

Mothers and babies during pregnancy are intertwined in a beautiful, intricate way. The flipside is that when something is going wrong with mom or baby, the other can be greatly affected. I was not considered high-risk during my first pregnancy. I was 30 years old and healthy, running six half-marathons in the previous two years. [...]

By |2018-07-18T20:11:11+00:00July 18th, 2018|Physical Health, Pregnancy|1 Comment

The Boy Who is the Same Age

Photo credit: Sublime Photo Art My best friend’s sister was due with her first child, a boy, in October 2014. I was due with my first child, also a boy, in September 2014. After my son was stillborn at 24 weeks gestation in May, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t [...]

How Rainbow Pregnancies Have Impacted My Loss Anniversary

Today is the fourth anniversary of the day my son was stillborn. In some ways it feels like it was just yesterday that I held him, and in other ways it seems like it was a lifetime ago. Adding to the emotions of that life-changing hello and heartbreaking goodbye at 24 weeks is that his [...]

Tracy’s Bump Day Blog, Our Birth Story: Introducing Holden Matthew

Holden’s birth story starts long before his birth. His oldest brother Brayden was stillborn at 24 weeks in 2014 due to undiagnosed severe pre-eclampsia and a placental abruption, masked by my very low baseline blood pressure that spiked at the end. Holden’s older sister Ainsley, our first rainbow, was conceived four months after we lost [...]