Kristen Paul

About Kristen Paul

Kristen Paul currently lives in Southern Maryland with her husband Darrell, and their two year-old rainbow, Noah, and their two cats. After discovering that their failure to conceive was due to both female and male factors, Kristen and her husband were elated when they became pregnant in March 2014 on their very first cycle of IVF with ICSI. In June of 2014, they were thrilled to find that they were having a healthy baby boy; after a perfect anatomy scan at 20 weeks, 2 days gestation, they expected to welcome their son in early December. Just 10 days after the anatomy scan, Kristen delivered their son, William Edward Paul, at just 21 weeks, 5 days gestation due to cervical insufficiency. Kristen had a transabdominal cerclage placed in late December of 2014; in March 2015, she underwent a second fresh IVF/ICSI cycle and became pregnant again. After a difficult pregnancy, Kristen delivered their rainbow, Noah, at 35+4 weeks gestation. She and Darrell and now happily raising a toddler and working on making him a big brother. Kristen may be contacted at

Life With Noah: Chasing Rainbows…

As people who have been reading my posts - first as a Bump Day Blogger, and now as a monthly Parenting After Loss contributor - know, our road to becoming parents was not an easy one.  Both Will (the son we lost to cervical insufficiency) and Noah (our amazing 17 month old rainbow miracle) were [...]

By | 2017-04-21T13:25:25+00:00 April 21st, 2017|Loss After Loss, Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Surely I’m Not the Only One…

  The past month has been an interesting one for me as a mother.  For the very first time, I spent a night away from Noah (I had an overnight business trip); even though he was in the very capable hands of his Dada - who is as amazing as a father as he is [...]

By | 2017-02-17T09:09:21+00:00 February 17th, 2017|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Motherhood When Grief and Joy Collide

For me, one of the most difficult things to deal with as the mother of both a living and a dead child is trying to balance grieving the loss of my late son with fully opening myself to the joy of raising my living one.  Having a living child by my side does not erase the [...]

By | 2017-01-20T07:22:37+00:00 January 20th, 2017|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Normal-Mama Fear, or Loss-Mama Fear?

A little over a week ago, someone in my MOMS Club posted something about a Mom's Day Out program at a local church.  For a moment, I got really excited about it: Once a week, for either a half or a full day, I could take Noah to the church and he would do crafts, [...]

By | 2016-12-15T22:17:33+00:00 December 16th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, Uncategorized|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Rough Days, Mom Guilt, and Love Beyond Measure

As I sit at my desk to compose this post, my now one year old rainbow miracle is jabbering away in the living room, freshly-washed and ready for bed.  I continue to be blown away at how quickly time seems to have passed since he was born; gone is the 5lb6oz, 18.5in baby we brought [...]

By | 2016-11-23T07:46:17+00:00 November 23rd, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|0 Comments

Life With Noah: I’m Not the Mom I Thought I’d Be (And That’s Okay)

22 days.  22 days until my rainbow miracle man turns one.  Holy moly. As I reflect on 11 months (and counting) of parenting after loss, the thing that strikes me that most is that I am so not the mom I thought I was going to be.  I was going to cloth diaper; he was [...]

By | 2016-10-21T09:28:20+00:00 October 21st, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|1 Comment

Life With Noah: Milestones (and Maybe Babies)

Ten months old.  Seems like just yesterday he was the itty-bitty guy laying in an isolette in the NICU, a respirator helping his not-quite-ready lungs breathe.  Now he's long, lean, and most definitely keeping us on our toes. The past couple of months have been full of milestones.  The little boy who was barely crawling [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:07:27+00:00 September 16th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Our Rainbow Will Know His Big Brother

Noah is now 9 months old.  The little boy who looked so tiny in his carseat as we left the NICU is now closing in on 18 pounds and is a full 10 inches longer than he was at birth.  We call him our little lollipop because he's got a 90th percentile head on a [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:07:44+00:00 August 19th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|0 Comments

Life With Noah: 8 Kisses

It seems like just yesterday we were visiting our teeny little preemie in the NICU, and he's now 8 months old and just over 17.5 pounds. One thing I've really struggled with over the past several months is feeling like I'm not enough for him, that somehow - even though I'm the one he spends [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:08:08+00:00 July 15th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|0 Comments

Life With Noah: All the Things I Was (and Wasn’t) Going to Do

Noah's seven months old now.  Wow.  When did that happen? Before I brought him home, I was so sure I knew exactly what I was and wasn't going to do parenting-wise.  He would never sleep in our bed (back is best, and in his own sleep space, right?)  He would wear cloth diapers.  I would make all of [...]

By | 2016-10-13T17:08:26+00:00 June 16th, 2016|Parenting After Loss, The First Year|0 Comments