Kristen Paul

About Kristen Paul

Kristen Paul currently lives in Southern Maryland with her husband Darrell, and their two year-old rainbow, Noah, and their two cats. After discovering that their failure to conceive was due to both female and male factors, Kristen and her husband were elated when they became pregnant in March 2014 on their very first cycle of IVF with ICSI. In June of 2014, they were thrilled to find that they were having a healthy baby boy; after a perfect anatomy scan at 20 weeks, 2 days gestation, they expected to welcome their son in early December. Just 10 days after the anatomy scan, Kristen delivered their son, William Edward Paul, at just 21 weeks, 5 days gestation due to cervical insufficiency. Kristen had a transabdominal cerclage placed in late December of 2014; in March 2015, she underwent a second fresh IVF/ICSI cycle and became pregnant again. After a difficult pregnancy, Kristen delivered their rainbow, Noah, at 35+4 weeks gestation. She and Darrell and now happily raising a toddler and working on making him a big brother. Kristen may be contacted at

Life With Noah: The Room at the Top of the Stairs

A little over a month ago, we made the decision to move Noah from the nursery into his "big-boy" bedroom. While we are thrilled with how his new room turned out, and how much he loves it, the process of moving him stirred up so many emotions. I was exactly 21 weeks pregnant with William [...]

By |2018-09-13T20:27:29+00:00September 13th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Raising An “Only Child” Who Isn’t…

"Is he your only child?" Of all of the questions I am asked about my rainbow, Noah, this is one of the most difficult for me to answer. From the standpoint of having a sibling, he is not an only child. He has an older brother, William, who died at birth just over 15 months before [...]

By |2018-08-16T21:08:05+00:00August 16th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Similar, But Not The Same

As a loss mother, one of the things I struggle with is how much my two sons – the one I lost moments after birth and the one who walks beside me – look alike. One of the first thoughts that popped into my mind as I gazed upon my newborn rainbow Noah was, “He [...]

By |2018-07-19T20:50:37+00:00July 19th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Maintaining Intimacy While on Pelvic Rest

“How are you ladies and your men dealing with pelvic rest?” “How does everyone cope with this pelvic rest thing?” “How do you maintain intimacy with your partner while you can’t actually be physically intimate?” I co-admin of a Facebook group for women (nearly 8,200 of them) with the condition that led to the loss [...]

By |2018-06-14T16:24:42+00:00June 14th, 2018|Emotional Health, Pregnancy|0 Comments

When Grief Comes Roaring Back In…

Nearly four years into my journey as a bereaved mother, I understand that there is an ebb and flow to my grief; some days are more difficult, some days are easier.  I also understand that the stages of grief are not nearly as linear as many believe them to be, and moving backwards and forwards [...]

By |2018-05-17T21:30:10+00:00May 17th, 2018|Emotional Health|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Our Hopes and Dreams for Our Child

Life has been pretty hectic since my last PALS post. In the last month, we’ve: Been assessed by a pediatric audiologist - All of the testing he was able to complete was normal, but we have to return later this year to attempt to finish the testing. Noah’s intolerance to anything on his head/in his [...]

By |2018-04-18T20:45:31+00:00April 19th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Life With Noah: Trusting Your Instincts

One of the hardest things for me to do as a mother is to know when to trust my own instincts, particularly when what my instincts are telling me and what other people are telling me aren't necessarily the same thing. I'm not only raising a child for the first time, I'm raising one after [...]

By |2018-03-12T15:54:43+00:00March 15th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Dearest Mama (or Dada), Wherever You Are, You Are Not Alone

Dearest Mama (or Dada), Wherever You Are in Your Journey After Loss, One of the things many loss parents struggle with is feeling that we are alone in our journey after loss.  I know I certainly did.  And one of the things that was critical to navigating my journey was discovering that I was not [...]

By |2018-02-12T17:30:43+00:00February 15th, 2018|Love Letters, PAL Fifth Annual Love Letters|0 Comments

Life With Noah: In Another Woman’s Care

One of the biggest changes in the Paul household in the past couple of months is that Noah started attending daycare. The decision to leave my child in another woman’s care was a difficult one; until he started daycare, Noah had only been in the care of a handful of people (7 total, including my [...]

By |2018-01-19T10:02:27+00:00January 18th, 2018|Parenting After Loss|0 Comments

Knowing When It’s Time

When I wrote my October PALS post, we were in the thick of a fresh IVF cycle – I’d just undergone an egg retrieval procedure and we had four perfect embryos. We were looking forward to transferring one of them a few days later, and hopeful that my next PALS post would be a pregnancy [...]

By |2017-12-14T21:25:24+00:00December 14th, 2017|Loss After Loss, Parenting After Loss|1 Comment