Dr. Deborah Simmons

About Dr. Deborah Simmons

Deborah Simmons, PhD, LMFT, is a marriage and family therapist and co-owner of partners (in)fertility of Minneapolis, a holistic mental health center. She has been working in the area of infertility, pregnancy loss, and reproductive complications since 1997. She has been a member of the American Society for Reproductive Medicine since 1998. She is on the Medical Advisory Team of the Star Legacy Foundation for Stillbirth Awareness. Dr. Simmons has worked in a fertility center and in private practice. She is particularly interested in the topic of reproductive decision-making. She is trained in EMDR and hypnosis, both of which have been very helpful to patients undergoing or healing from medical procedures and pregnancy loss. She is active on social media on her blog, Facebook, and Twitter.

Purple Hearts and Battle Scars

I met a nice woman recently while I was on vacation and we chatted about our lives. When I told her what I do for a living—working with people who are suffering from infertility and pregnancy loss—she told me declaratively that stillbirth doesn’t happen anymore. I corrected her and told her that grieving women and [...]

Five Pregnancy Loss Helpers from Hell

Recently, I was listening to Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle. This woman has been through a heck of a lot, mostly self-inflicted, but I will give her a lot of credit for having the courage to heal through the haze and pain of her own life. I was listening to the book and I almost [...]

By |2018-04-10T18:02:01-04:00April 10th, 2018|Emotional Health, From Professionals|0 Comments

From Black and White to Color

Grief leaches the color from daily life. Grief is monochromatic. A Seattle-gray day. The sameness can feel endless. Wake up, be smacked by the reality of your grief, crawl through the day, go to sleep, start over. Same ol’, same ol’. You are missing your baby. Yes. Yes, you are. And you will tomorrow, too. [...]

By |2018-01-02T20:42:56-04:00January 2nd, 2018|Emotional Health, From Professionals|0 Comments

5 Important Things to Know About Recurrent Miscarriage

1. First and most important, miscarriage is never your fault. Never ever. There is a reason. We just may not ever figure out what it is. One miscarriage is difficult and heartbreaking. Recurrent miscarriages are confusing and devastating. The timing of a miscarriage may suggest different causes. Kristi Bothur at the blog This Side of Heaven, [...]

A Garden Legacy to Beloved Babies

There are so many ways to connect with people we love, both those who are living and those who have passed away. This blog post was inspired by a conversation I had recently with Alison Feik, a Minnesota artist and environmental designer. Alison Feik has a profound interest in the healing properties of plants, energetically, [...]

By |2017-08-07T14:51:12-04:00August 7th, 2017|From Professionals|0 Comments

Why We Name Our Babies with Tender Care

“A good name is more desirable than great riches and loving favor is better than silver and gold."   World English Bible Proverbs 22:1 I once met a woman named Glorious.  Her name was absolutely perfect for her—open, joyful, warm and, frankly, glorious is every way.  She told me that her name had led her [...]

And then the Sun Comes Up the Next Day

I am going through photographs of life that I have taken over the last few years. I have certain ways that I like to shoot photos: The rule of thirds. Shooting into the sun. Shooting close-up. A consistent theme is the way that I look for the sun. Maybe the sun is my reminder that [...]

By |2017-01-02T10:53:31-04:00January 2nd, 2017|Emotional Health, From Professionals|0 Comments

Meh-ry Christmas?

The holidays are so happy for everybody! Maybe. I just had to say that. The holidays can bring a maelstrom of feelings for many. The Hellidays. Meh-ry Christmas. When you are grieving, the holidays can feel overwhelming. This can be worsened by others’ demands for traditional activities, places, foods, and happiness. When my daughter was [...]

By |2016-12-06T09:28:32-04:00December 5th, 2016|Emotional Health, From Professionals, TTC|0 Comments

The Light of Their Memory

Their Light Remains by Dr. Deborah Simmons In this Pregnancy Loss and Infant Awareness Month, I honor babies who have died in utero, at delivery, and in the NICU.  Their spirits remain.  Always. Every day.  In our hearts, and bodies, and minds.  And not just in October. The light of their memory remains [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:07:19-04:00October 10th, 2016|Emotional Health, From Professionals|0 Comments

Writing Real Memos in Your Relationship

I’m the truth teller in a family of secret-keepers.  I talk. I tell. I tend to talk about e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g with my husbando.  He has learned to put up with me.  Here’s an example: Husbando:  Hey, whatcha doin’ in there? Me: Well, um, makin’ a number two. Husbando:  I don’t need to know that! Me:  I [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:07:36-04:00September 5th, 2016|Emotional Health, From Professionals|0 Comments